You are no help to my academic career!"
This was the first thought that popped when her thoughts were trying to hack my mind. All of that life for a whole semester was bullshit, I wasted my time. Realized!
Most of us have, at one point, uttered this word.
Perhaps under our breath, as a whisper, fading into the nitrogen of the air. Or written down on a piece of paper, ink bleeding into the organic fibers of the parchment.
Some of us have even screamed this word, a desperate plea, an extended promise, one hand outreached, impatient for another. Some of us have weaved this word into lullabies; some have murmured it between tears and midnight kisses.
"Stay."
The only word I would have said more than a hundred times to one of my best friends!
She found a boyfriend in no time , I had no problem with that, but the importance she gave to me when he wasn’t in the picture, that lessened.
Slowly over the end of the semester, they became closer and started pushing me away. I felt very okay with that too, because I know that’s how life runs.
A real life example I had that girls always like bad boys than good boys :P
( I am a bad boy too, very bad boy in fact. I love people unconditionally! That's too bad. Had no luck though. :P)
I had no idea what to do, except for leaving them and let them be and thanking myself for doing so, for being so optimistic by choosing the right choice over the materialistic people. This I realised only when I was out of the situation.
I couldn’t bear it, I never even had thoughts to break somebody’s heart by moving away. That's not my character, I give a lot of importance and respect to People and their lives, because I expect the same in lieu.
I started to change. A lot. Focused on myself and career. Never gave any shit about anybody saying anything. Because I know myself better than anyone else and I know what I am doing. I have a big plan. Always had a big plan. And started working towards that.
That was the best decision I have ever taken in my life till date.
________
And today she comes back to me and says that " I did a mistake, I screwed it up. All this time I was in a cloud of fantasy and now I see the reality"
I said - Hey, hi. It's been a while. I totally understand that you see the reality now. It's wonderful. Better late than never right!
She - So, how's life? Anything interesting?
I said - Yes, a whole lot. You taught me how to love myself, by choosing someone else! And I grew so much into it that I cannot love anyone else, until I figure out, I have loved myself enough to love someone else like that.
She - huh?
I said - Yeah, I know! Just want to let you know that I'm always here if you need anything. As a best friend! :)
________
This reminds me of a movie scene where the guy feels super happy when a girl who rejected him comes back to him. That's definitely an amazing feeling.
Maybe I've been harsh. But I have my reasons. Career was always a first preference. It will be, Until I realise I have done enough!
Love is unconditional - Break free - But never break hearts!
With Love <3
Moe.
